Sunday, January 6, 2013

Days 5 and 6

Dear God, I cannot see how You can grow me through my mistakes or how Your power could be possibly be at work in my life right now. Tom just said something that was so much more hurtful than the worst thing I could ever say to anyone. For His words mirrored exactly the negative words I heard from the church since they sent me for testing and got back the autism diagnosis. And those words are that I will NEVER be able to.... Never be able to do.... Never be able to have.... Never be able to be.... Right now I hate how You created me and I hate having autism. If Tom gives up on me, I don't feel comfortable continuing in relationship with You God because I am absolutely honestly afraid You will do the same thing. I'm sorry God. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

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