A Crown for You

"Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's." - Psalm 103:1-5

Thus says the Lord: "The people who survived the sword found grace in the wilderness; when Israel sought for rest, the Lord appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you." - Jeremiah 31:2-3

"Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us." - Psalm 62:8

Dear God,

You have a crown for me that is better than any crown that man could ever fashion because the crown You have for me is one of love and mercy. I depend on the blessings of love and mercy and You delight in giving them to me. I just need to admit how much I need You. There is no limit to what You can do for me. Your love is a gift. Your love will last forever. And You give me tender mercy again and again. I will make mistakes but You will forgive me when I come to You. I am Yours, the child of the King. You bought me with Your own blood. And You crown me with Your love and mercy. Today, I hang on to these promises as I have to go to clinic and possibly ER because of pain and fever. I ask that You continue to work on my behalf to make sure the republicans don't screw up my access to healthcare and medicine I need. I ask that You continue to provide.

Thank You.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen

I Can Take Care of That

"Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved." - Psalm 55:22

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." - Matthew 11:28-30

"But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation." - Psalm 13:5

Dear God,

I am giving You my worries because I really need You to take care of me right now. I need You to carry me through them. The discord in this country has become quite unbearable. I am giving You the Trump disaster. And I am going to struggle to survive it, but I will hope that You will indeed keep Your promises to see me through it all. You say You work everything out for the good of those who believe in You. So here You go God. I am giving it over to You as best as I can and I am hoping in You as best as I can. Healthcare, housing, food, finances, all these things. I am trusting You to continue with Your provision.

Thank You.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen

He Is the God of All Time and All That Is

Psalm 32:6 - Therefore let everyone who is godly offer a prayer to you at a time when you may be found; surely in the rush of great waters, they shall not reach him. 

Psalm 55:17 - Evening and morning and at noon I utter my complaint and moan, and he hears my voice.

Psalm 62:8 - Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.

Dear God, it is so easy to trust You when things are going well. But what I need to learn is to still trust You when things are not going as well. You will heal me from this Eustachian tube infection. You will provide for my family financially. You will help direct my doctors to act instead of just waiting and seeing as my immune system crashes. I may be in the midst of a storm right now, but You are still there. Whether or not I see You or feel You. Autism is not a punishment. It is a blessing. Because You sometimes intend for us to go through things so we can bless others through our experiences. Thank You. In Jesus Name' Amen!

Sitting Quietly in the Presence of God

II Corinthians 5:7 - ...for we walk by faith, not by sight.

Philippians 4:19 - And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

Dear God, I am in poverty financially, but American poverty might not look the same as in other countries. Those in America in poverty though are being criminalized by the GOP right now. They are being called lazy even if they work full time. They are being called lazy even if they are disabled. And all they are asking is for help filling the unmet basic needs. They might have shelter but then might not have enough for food or medical care. You are a provider though, and a mighty good one. You will always provide even if and when it seems the world has become cold and heartless. I pray for Your continued provision for my family. Thank You. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

Let Go and Know God

Psalm 46:10 - "Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!"

Colossians 4:2 - Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving.

II Peter 1:3-4 - His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become par takers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire.

Dear God, thank You for the work You are doing on the path toward what will hopefully be reconciliation with Tom. Thank You for constant protection and provision even if my family doesn't know how it will happen or when it will happen. Thank You for love, steadfast and eternal and unconditional. Thank You for life. Thank You for doctors who invest in my care. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

The Language of Heaven

Psalm 100:4-5 - Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name!

Acts 9:18-19 - And immediately something like scales fell from his eyes, and he regained his sight. Then he rose and was baptized; and taking food, he was strengthened.

Colossians 3:15 - And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.

Revelation 19:3-6 - Once more they cried out, "Hallelujah! The smoke from her goes up forever and ever." And the twenty-four elders and the four living creatures fell down and worshiped God who was seated on the throne, saying, "Amen. Hallelujah!" And from the throne came a voice saying, "Praise our God, all you his servants, you who fear him, small and great." Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out, "Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns."

Dear God, help me to stay focused on You. Help me to just relax and let You take the wheel. How fitting this passage is that it fell on Thanksgiving Day this year. Thank You for allowing me to outlive the doctor prognosis placed on me at birth by 31 years now. I may not be the healthiest, but I am alive. Thank You for my precious furbabies, Katie and Molly. Undoubtedly, they would not have lived as long as they have if not for You placing them in my life. Not only do I have special needs, but so do they. Thank You for teaching me ACTIVE grace. Thank You for teaching me REAL compassion. Thank You for teaching me that generosity isn't just about giving money, but giving time and energy to truly just be there for others. And yes, thank You for Tom, who even though he has yet to ask for forgiveness or to forgive me, he will eventually because he is a wise person who does care. I know that in my heart. Thank You also for my mom, who understands me better than many others ever will. Help her find a new job soon so she will not worry about where the money for bills will come from. And thank You for Dee at the library who is allowing me to volunteer one day a week right now to help me get accustomed to doing something that will build endurance and might eventually lead to a job. She is a very wise woman who has found some of my many strengths. Thank You. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

I Will Take Care of You

Deuteronomy 33:27 - The eternal God is your dwelling place, and underneath are the everlasting arms. And he thrust out the enemy before you and said, Destroy.

Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.

Jeremiah 29:13-14 - You will seek me and find me. When you seek me with all your heart, I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I have sent you into exile.

Dear God, I thought I could trust Your provision for me but hateful people are out there harming me every time I turn around. Now I am being starved to death just because I am disabled, and it really hurts. Lazy people who CAN work get full benefits while disabled people get cut off from having food? And because of the abuse I suffered from a church for having autism, I have no resources for making sure I have food. Allergy free foods are not cheap! It isn't fair God! It isn't fair! The republicans have really screwed up big time. Yet they claim to be Christians. Well, if they were truly Christians, they would make sure I have enough resources to have enough food to eat, get the healthcare I need, and can save for emergencies! They have been sitting on the ABLE Act for over seven years now! Without that, I am not able to save for an emergency. If an emergency happened today, it could cost me $5000, but I am not allowed to even have $2000 in my name. Without proper food, I can get sick and die. But do they care? No! And now I am beginning to wonder if YOU care now as well. Just when I thought You cared, something else came along to mess things up for me and shake my trust in You. I am wavering today. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

Thank You

Thank you Tom Patton for being a really good friend. You truly are an amazing example of what God's grace is like. Goodness knows I've given you plenty of reasons to give up on me, but you're still there spurring me onto better things.

Thank you Janet Jerez for being a positive influence right now.

Thank you to the Patton family who has taken me under its wings, ever so slowly, but has made me feel very loved even in a time when I felt unlovable.

Thank you Elizabeth Brown for your prayers.

Thank you momma for birthing me. I always have been a bit of a challenge since my conception.

Thank you God for even on my worst days You are helping me grow in my faith and trust, not just in You but in others, especially Tom. And that's awesome!

Thank you to all the new and old friends who are in my life. I wish I could thank each person by name, but then this post would take three years to read!

Dear God, thank you for my friends and for Your protection. Please help the technicians and the doctors tomorrow to be able to find out what is causing the pain and the intestinal blockage, and if it requires surgery, guide their hands. Please show us Your provision right now. I usually wouldn't ask for monetary provision, but that is what we need right now. In Jesus' Name, Amen.