1. I'm sorry to my friend Tom for experiencing my first real fit of jealousy last week. It's not the jealousy itself that was the problem. It's what I did because of it.
2. Life lesson: As bad we might have it, and some of us have bad, there's always someone who has it worse than we do. For example: As lacking as the U.S. is in coverage for adults with autism (and access to therapy and services and equipment grants and iPad grants and church ministries to/for/with them which often leads to exclusion which actually is an offense against the least of these and thus against Jesus), as lacking as the U.S. is, a film, Not Forgotten done by some Birmingham and other Alabama folks showed me that as lacking as we are in continued coverage and support (1 in 88 children will grow into many adults (statistics may be higher factoring adults)), we are not as bad off as others. In the Ukraine, they have even less support. There is one home. Otherwise, much like in the U.S., the children may or not go to school and many parents may stay with them hardly going anywhere for fear of what their child or adult with autism may do if they were not accompanied. Some of these children have no fathers present because the fathers took off. The mothers often quit their jobs to care for their loved one. The other choice? Institutions. Government run institutions that may treat the person as an animal. Saw the film Friday. If you get to go to a screening, please do. Was saddened to hear that as of the last few weeks that one child was turned over to an institution and a second was going to be handed over to one. These children had potential. Now they will have a "meaningless existence." Why? Because professionals and parents don't understand autism. They haven't been educated. Which brings me to something else.
3. Education. April is Autism Awareness Month. April 2 was/is World Autism Awareness Day. Okay. So now you have awareness. But you know what? Don't stop there. Education is more crucial. You see, when you go beyond awareness and educate yourself, then you truly begin to accept. And like any other human being, we, I, want to be accepted. Many of us don't tell others about our autism for as long as possible because of the misconceptions and stigmas. I spent most of last year hearing two thirds of a group that was supposed to help me tell me I couldn't do things that others in the church could do because "You have autism and because of the autism you lack empathy and might unknowingly offend someone." Forget the fact that they sent me for ABA therapy. Forget the fact that they didn't even bother to give me a chance before they just wrote me off and completely excluded me unless I agreed to sign a document agreeing to be permanently excluded from an activity non-members were allowed to do and reminding me that I was never forgiven and never going to be forgiven by the man in charge there. Forget that. Because that's not what bothered me the most an not the root of the reason I left them to find a better place, a safer place, until God changes their heart song and they establish special needs ministry for both children and adults. And I don't know if I have told Tom the root reason because up until now I never really understood the root reason myself. It wasn't just the document. It wasn't just the actions. It was the attitude. Many times last year I slapped God in the face. Many times last year I said I wished I was normal and hated how God created me. Until one third of that group finally told me to read Max Lucado's "You Are Special." Why? Because she had the same conversation with her own daughter. Her daughter has Down's. But when I looked at her daughter, I didn't see Down's. I saw a beautiful young lady with a lot of potential because she had a mom that was fully invested in her. But before that person moved, she told me that I needed to consider going somewhere else that was more accepting of people like me. And I realized that she was probably a little worried about what could happen to her own daughter there. Because until a person either has a loved one with special needs or takes time to educate themselves, they will always only ever believe the misconceptions. Which leads me to another point.
4. Tom, thank you for moving beyond awareness of autism with me. Thank you for educating yourself. And most of all, thank you for being my friend. I know I don't always show it, but I appreciate it more than you'll ever know and I love you for it. You have accepted me for me and looked past my labels at the person that God is growing me to be. You have given me freedom to make mistakes yet stayed beside me when I realize them and come running back for help processing things. You have exemplified God and Jesus and I am growing closer to them as a result. Although I'm not where we want me to be just yet, you are not rushing me before I'm ready, but neither are you holding me back when I am ready. You saw potential in me, and rather than give up because I might be slower than others, you kept encouraging me and spurring me on. And in part, because of you, I have learned determination and courage. You believed in me when others didn't. You took a risk to stay friends with me, and now look where things are: you have been seeing me through a lot of firsts! Many milestones and successes. And I'm a better person now than before. I see God through how you treat me. And God is awesome and I want more of Him. I'm still going to run back to you sometimes, but I'm running back and forth now. At least it's a start.
Finally,
5. I ask prayers. For a while now I have been feeling a nudge to return to NYC for a week or two for missions. Then I received a calling last year to do something for people (both children and adults) who have autism like I do. Currently, I am now leaning toward pursuit of becoming a licensed interpreter for the Deaf and so during this coming summer I will be going back and forth between two churches, the one I plan to join and the one I will do cultural immersion in while class is on summer break. Probably just once a month for now unless I can hit more 8:00 services then fly over to the other church. I will be juggling at any rate because it's not the first leaning toward interpreter that I have had. I think it's stronger now because I know I have autism. But here's the thing. I still have a call. And God is starting to open the doors. I started painting. And Tom knows because I told him, but I plan to start selling my art under Essie Spann, Art for Autism. And part of the proceeds will go for organizations including churches that currently are serving or are planning to start serving adults with autism. Why? Because children with autism grow up and there's not a magic wand to make the autism automatically go away when they become adults. And continued ABA therapy, speech therapy, occupational therapy can help. I'm in ABA. I'm about to restart speech. I'm going to be starting back with the psychologist who tested me. And at some point, I might start OT, but for now, it's one new therapy at a time. But because of the difficulties I have been having in finding services, I want others to have it easier. Also, some of the proceeds will go towards missions projects, especially ones that help with special needs and autism. My first steps are happening now. But I'm not done yet.
Dear God, thank You for answered prayer last week with Tom's daughter's wedding. Please help bring back some of his sanity. I look forward to scheduling another visit with him soon and even finding a special time to see him for a good-bye before he goes on his trip around the globe. Also, I'm hoping he'll be able to see me "graduate" and do my membership vows in the next month or two. Forgive me for how I sinned against both You and Tom when I was jealous last week and thank You for reminding me why You put Tom in my life first as a friend and second as a father figure/role model/example/mentor. Thank You for giving him a good heart, strong enough and big enough to love me even I am not the most lovable and for him being teachable so he learns how to love me better as a friend as I also learn how to love him better as a friend. And God, I don't know if I have said it to You yet, because I am still learning, but God, I love You. Thank You for loving me too, loving me bigger. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Showing posts with label Missions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Missions. Show all posts
Monday, April 22, 2013
Thursday, January 31, 2013
I Have to Play Catch Up Now I'm Better
Tomorrow will be my catch up post. Being sick is rough! Sinus infection. Severe. Mom said she nearly fainted when they told her how much the medicine was. I said, "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you it was the expensive medicine and we haven't met the medicine deductible yet!" Oops!! Nearly $200 for 10 pills. And I can't start them until the morning because I need to sleep! The ENT sprayed stuff in my nose and it is helping me feel better already. Smily is back!
By the way, praise God for small miracles and forgiving friends like Tom. Seriously, if I could take him with me everywhere I would! Today I transitioned again. And now I got a book to help me with that transition. My mom got it at her parent group during my social group.
Have to get dog vaccinated. Sadly late due to cost. But definitely have to do it because later this year I have to board my deaf dog and cat with megacolon so I can do a weekend camp/retreat for special needs.
Definitely planning on selling art and maybe looking at doing puppet shows on donations so I can raise money for churches and other organizations to help them establish special needs ministries for adults, particularly adults with autism like me. As soon as I finish piece number two, it will go on semi-public display and anyone who sees it can make an offer on it.
I am feeling God moving me right now. I just don't have all the specific information. I think I'm starting to understand what missionaries go through!
Keep my family in prayers. Keep my friends, especially Tom in prayers. Keep praying for the little boy in south Alabama an for my family and friends who live and work down there.
By the way, praise God for small miracles and forgiving friends like Tom. Seriously, if I could take him with me everywhere I would! Today I transitioned again. And now I got a book to help me with that transition. My mom got it at her parent group during my social group.
Have to get dog vaccinated. Sadly late due to cost. But definitely have to do it because later this year I have to board my deaf dog and cat with megacolon so I can do a weekend camp/retreat for special needs.
Definitely planning on selling art and maybe looking at doing puppet shows on donations so I can raise money for churches and other organizations to help them establish special needs ministries for adults, particularly adults with autism like me. As soon as I finish piece number two, it will go on semi-public display and anyone who sees it can make an offer on it.
I am feeling God moving me right now. I just don't have all the specific information. I think I'm starting to understand what missionaries go through!
Keep my family in prayers. Keep my friends, especially Tom in prayers. Keep praying for the little boy in south Alabama an for my family and friends who live and work down there.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Kids, Dogs, Service, Sorting, Getting Lost, Almost Destroying a Car, Steven Curtis Chapman, Storms, Accidental Fasting, and Chaos - How It All Ties in to Theology, Missions, and Disaster Relief
"Kids, Dogs, Service, Sorting, Getting Lost, Almost Destroying a Car, Steven Curtis Chapman, Storms, Accidental Fasting, and Chaos - How It All Ties in to Theology, Missions, and Disaster Relief" has got to be my longest blog post title ever. I'm not sure, but it may be the longest title of anything ever. If you find anything in the record books longer than this title, let me know.
Chaos. The last two weeks. My AD/HD and my brain are going crazy. Next week is going to be a week that I'll HAVE to consistently take my Vyvanse regardless of how I feel. I need some sleep. By the end of next week if I have not been able to quiet my overactive brain, I'll have to call my prescribing doctor and see about a non-addictive sleeping medicine. I hate sleeping medications, but my brain won't SHUT UP! Oh, and let's see. I've got about four songs running through my head all at once that all encourage me and have served as inspiration through these past two weeks, particularly this past week and a half since April 27, 2011. Thank you TobyMac, Casting Crowns and Steven Curtis Chapman.
Kids. The first thought that came in my head when I awoke April 28, 2011 was all those children just lost everything. They don't even have a stuffed animal to hold right now. I look at my bed. I see the one my mother swears I stole from her when I just a little baby. I see one from one of my two trips to New York City to the Disney Store. I see my first bear from Build-a-Bear. I see a black panther I had gotten my first year at the University of Montevallo when I visited Toys R Us in Hoover that I called Salem after the black cat in Sabrina, the Teenage Witch. But those kids lost everything. So I contacted Build-a-Bear. Last I heard from them is that they were working with the Red Cross, but they thanked me for thinking of them and how they might be able to help. I just found a twin to one of the little plushes I have that I can donate. I have another twin around somewhere that I would like to find and donate as well. Already donated four stuffed toys. Two of them were these pillow pet type of things that can serve dual function.
Dogs. The second thought in my head was pets. What happened to all the animals? I remember one of the reasons some people didn't evacuate for Katrina was that they didn't want to leave their family pet behind. Some of the pets have ended up in foster homes until their owners can be relocated out of shelters. Some of the animals found range from newborn puppies and kittens to older animals. A few, sadly, have died. Some have been reunited with their families. And the saddest thing to me is the fact that those litters have possibly lost their own mother cats and dogs. Too young to survive on their own, and possibly too young to survive. I remember one of my first dogs was a rescue from a flood in Oklahoma. The poor thing never could get over storms after that. He was seen floating atop a dog house. He died several years later after I had to leave him behind during the move to Alabama. He had heartworms. I only saw him once between the move and his passing. He barely remembered me.
Service. Let's just say that anything that anyone does toward the disaster relief, be it clean up or sorting clothes or even just donating, is service.
Sorting. Sorting clothes. My first time was sorting at the Christian Service Mission in Birmingham. I was hand sanitizing left and right after that one. Someone tried donating dirty underwear. Not just used, but really badly stained. EW!! I am fine with gently used shoes even though I would never buy shoes from a thrift store. But all I could think is come on people. You would not debase yourself to buy used underclothes or socks or bathing suit bottoms from a thrift store or yard sale, let's not subject our victims to them either! My second sorting job was at the Salvation Army Disaster Relief Warehouse. Sort of in between Birmingham and Bessemer. It was better except for the bags of strongly smelling of cigarette trigger an asthma attack clothing. Ugh. And one of the people who ended up helping at my table found an adult clown costume. All we could do was laugh. It was a little sad.
Getting lost. What I did when I was going to the Christian Service Mission. Should have followed the GPS mapping on my phone. Ended up following the exit and got turned around because the street was a one way street. That part of Birmingham is not very safe for single women under 40. I feel safer alone on the streets and the subways of New York City than I did around there.
Almost destroying a car. Really. The road leading to the Salvation Army warehouse was worse than the potholes and craters on I-65. But I felt safer. However, I am noting that I need to work on finding any and all possible alternative routes that don't use I-65.
Steven Curtis Chapman. Got stuck on a song of his this week that fit all too perfectly with everything that Alabama just experienced. I'll post the lyrics and a link at the bottom of this post.
Storms. The more we have threaten Alabama, the more fearful and anxious I become. My city and my county were spared the worst of the damage. And every time I close my eyes, I see trees falling and getting uprooted. Because in three of the storms during April, we have had three trees break and crash.
Accidental fasting. Yep. It's been so bad in the state of surrealism about everything that I accidentally fasted the greater part of the week. I did not realize that I did not eat anything Sunday until midnight. And I've been lucky if I've eaten at least a snack one time during the day the rest of the week!
How does it tie in to theology, missions and disaster relief?
Theology is shaken and stirred and tested when anyone experiences the travesty this great state of Alabama has just been through. Hollywood cannot even begin to come close to being able to portray what happened last week with that monster tornado. How do you handle the theological questions that arise? Why? How come? Why would a loving God allow this to happen? Why would He spare some but not others? Why would He spare me and not them?
Missions. Whether it's going to sort clothes, going to do debris removal or going to serve a hot meal to a community that was affected, it's missions.
Disaster relief. Anything can count as disaster relief. Donating time and money and clothes/items, cleaning up, rebuilding.
TobyMac's "Get Back Up" and "City on Our Knees" were the first two songs that moved me this week. Casting Crowns "Praise You in This Storm" followed. The other day I heard Steven Curtis Chapman's "Beauty Will Rise." It is this last song that I felt more strongly compelled by. As I thought about my own church, Oak Mountain Presbyterian Church, PCA, and the relief efforts that have spun out in response to the disaster.
My first year in Alabama I survived Hurricane Opal. Hurricane Ivan ripped through as far up as Montevallo. I went home to be close to family when that was approaching. I remember having to check in with my resident hall assistant before leaving. But I never thought that other than the random "snow" events which pale in comparison to what New England goes through that my part of Alabama would ever see anything like the images we saw when the tornado ripped through Enterprise (near which I lived for the first half of my life in Alabama (which is exactly half of my life)) or the tornado that ripped through Prattville or the images from Hurricane Katrina. I never would have imagined it to be possible. It is for this very reason that the Steven Curtis Chapman song has really compelled me more than the other songs.
"It was the day the world went wrong." April 27, 2011 started and ended on a bad note for Alabama. There is hardly a county from Montgomery north that was not touched by that nasty storm system that brought that monster through Tuscaloosa, Birmingham, Cullman and every small and large town and city in between and around it.
"I screamed til my voice was gone." I think a lot of us have screamed. In horror. In anger. In pain. In anguish.
"And watched through the tears as everything came crashing down." I have not personally gone to Tuscaloosa yet. I do not quite have the courage and the strength yet. But I have seen the images. For me, the full reality has not sunk in yet. But we certainly watched in horror as the face of these areas were changed in a matter of minutes and hours.
"Slowly panic turns to pain as we awake to what remains and sift through the ashes that are left behind." I think of everyone sorting through the rubble, the remains of homes, churches, daycares, schools, businesses, etc. I think of the heartache that many are feeling as they find pictures, documents, toys, remnants of what was a life that was relatively normal as possible before that monster came through and changed everything.
"But buried deep beneath all our broken dreams we have this hope." We do have a hope. A hope and a promise. One of a better life. Maybe not on this earth, but it most certainly will be for the elect, those that belong to God.
Chorus:
"Out of theses ashes...beauty will rise." The cities and towns will be much more beautiful after they rebuild than they ever were.
"And we will dance among the ruins." For every person or animal found alive, there is joy.
"We will see Him with our own eyes." God is in every person who comes to the aid of the victims of this monster.
"Out of these ashes...beauty will rise."
"For we know joy is coming in the morning, in the morning, beauty will rise."
"So take another breath for now, and let the tears come washing down." Right now, we hurt. We need time to heal. And there will be tears. That's perfectly fine.
"And if you can't believe I will believe for you." Your faith may be weak. My faith may be tested. But together we can trust that things will indeed work together for the good of those who love the Lord.
"'Cuz I have seen the signs of spring! Just watch and see." Every little bird and every little flower that survived the storms that ripped through Alabama April 27 is a testimony of hope that springs eternal.
Chorus
"I can hear it in the distance and it's not too far away." Help is coming. That help is beautiful.
"It's the music and the laughter of a wedding and a feast." I went to Moody with my church this week to a church there that suffered a hole in their roof. But I did not see fear and tears. I saw strength and courage. I saw inspiration. I talked with a couple of little boys who were hanging out by the truck that brought the food afterward. They were both five and in kindergarten. One of them is really excited about starting first grade after the summer. Does he even know or understand how that storm disrupted his life? I don't know, but it was encouraging.
"I can almost feel the hand of God reaching for my face to wipe the tears away and say, 'It's time to make everything new.'"
"Make it all new." And new it will be made.
"This is our hope. This is the promise. This is our hope. This is the promise. That it would take our breath away to see the beauty that's been made out of the ashes, out of the ashes, that it would take our breath away to see the beauty that He's made out of the ashes, out of the ashes." As cities and communities rebuild, it will be beautiful.
Chorus
"Oh, beauty will rise. Oh, beauty will rise. Oh, oh, oh, beauty will rise. Oh, oh, oh, beauty will rise. Oh, oh, oh, beauty will rise." Beauty will indeed rise.
Lyrics from http://www.metrolyrics.com/beauty-will-rise-lyrics-steven-curtis-chapman.html.
And that's how everything begins to fit together.
Chaos. The last two weeks. My AD/HD and my brain are going crazy. Next week is going to be a week that I'll HAVE to consistently take my Vyvanse regardless of how I feel. I need some sleep. By the end of next week if I have not been able to quiet my overactive brain, I'll have to call my prescribing doctor and see about a non-addictive sleeping medicine. I hate sleeping medications, but my brain won't SHUT UP! Oh, and let's see. I've got about four songs running through my head all at once that all encourage me and have served as inspiration through these past two weeks, particularly this past week and a half since April 27, 2011. Thank you TobyMac, Casting Crowns and Steven Curtis Chapman.
Kids. The first thought that came in my head when I awoke April 28, 2011 was all those children just lost everything. They don't even have a stuffed animal to hold right now. I look at my bed. I see the one my mother swears I stole from her when I just a little baby. I see one from one of my two trips to New York City to the Disney Store. I see my first bear from Build-a-Bear. I see a black panther I had gotten my first year at the University of Montevallo when I visited Toys R Us in Hoover that I called Salem after the black cat in Sabrina, the Teenage Witch. But those kids lost everything. So I contacted Build-a-Bear. Last I heard from them is that they were working with the Red Cross, but they thanked me for thinking of them and how they might be able to help. I just found a twin to one of the little plushes I have that I can donate. I have another twin around somewhere that I would like to find and donate as well. Already donated four stuffed toys. Two of them were these pillow pet type of things that can serve dual function.
Dogs. The second thought in my head was pets. What happened to all the animals? I remember one of the reasons some people didn't evacuate for Katrina was that they didn't want to leave their family pet behind. Some of the pets have ended up in foster homes until their owners can be relocated out of shelters. Some of the animals found range from newborn puppies and kittens to older animals. A few, sadly, have died. Some have been reunited with their families. And the saddest thing to me is the fact that those litters have possibly lost their own mother cats and dogs. Too young to survive on their own, and possibly too young to survive. I remember one of my first dogs was a rescue from a flood in Oklahoma. The poor thing never could get over storms after that. He was seen floating atop a dog house. He died several years later after I had to leave him behind during the move to Alabama. He had heartworms. I only saw him once between the move and his passing. He barely remembered me.
Service. Let's just say that anything that anyone does toward the disaster relief, be it clean up or sorting clothes or even just donating, is service.
Sorting. Sorting clothes. My first time was sorting at the Christian Service Mission in Birmingham. I was hand sanitizing left and right after that one. Someone tried donating dirty underwear. Not just used, but really badly stained. EW!! I am fine with gently used shoes even though I would never buy shoes from a thrift store. But all I could think is come on people. You would not debase yourself to buy used underclothes or socks or bathing suit bottoms from a thrift store or yard sale, let's not subject our victims to them either! My second sorting job was at the Salvation Army Disaster Relief Warehouse. Sort of in between Birmingham and Bessemer. It was better except for the bags of strongly smelling of cigarette trigger an asthma attack clothing. Ugh. And one of the people who ended up helping at my table found an adult clown costume. All we could do was laugh. It was a little sad.
Getting lost. What I did when I was going to the Christian Service Mission. Should have followed the GPS mapping on my phone. Ended up following the exit and got turned around because the street was a one way street. That part of Birmingham is not very safe for single women under 40. I feel safer alone on the streets and the subways of New York City than I did around there.
Almost destroying a car. Really. The road leading to the Salvation Army warehouse was worse than the potholes and craters on I-65. But I felt safer. However, I am noting that I need to work on finding any and all possible alternative routes that don't use I-65.
Steven Curtis Chapman. Got stuck on a song of his this week that fit all too perfectly with everything that Alabama just experienced. I'll post the lyrics and a link at the bottom of this post.
Storms. The more we have threaten Alabama, the more fearful and anxious I become. My city and my county were spared the worst of the damage. And every time I close my eyes, I see trees falling and getting uprooted. Because in three of the storms during April, we have had three trees break and crash.
Accidental fasting. Yep. It's been so bad in the state of surrealism about everything that I accidentally fasted the greater part of the week. I did not realize that I did not eat anything Sunday until midnight. And I've been lucky if I've eaten at least a snack one time during the day the rest of the week!
How does it tie in to theology, missions and disaster relief?
Theology is shaken and stirred and tested when anyone experiences the travesty this great state of Alabama has just been through. Hollywood cannot even begin to come close to being able to portray what happened last week with that monster tornado. How do you handle the theological questions that arise? Why? How come? Why would a loving God allow this to happen? Why would He spare some but not others? Why would He spare me and not them?
Missions. Whether it's going to sort clothes, going to do debris removal or going to serve a hot meal to a community that was affected, it's missions.
Disaster relief. Anything can count as disaster relief. Donating time and money and clothes/items, cleaning up, rebuilding.
TobyMac's "Get Back Up" and "City on Our Knees" were the first two songs that moved me this week. Casting Crowns "Praise You in This Storm" followed. The other day I heard Steven Curtis Chapman's "Beauty Will Rise." It is this last song that I felt more strongly compelled by. As I thought about my own church, Oak Mountain Presbyterian Church, PCA, and the relief efforts that have spun out in response to the disaster.
My first year in Alabama I survived Hurricane Opal. Hurricane Ivan ripped through as far up as Montevallo. I went home to be close to family when that was approaching. I remember having to check in with my resident hall assistant before leaving. But I never thought that other than the random "snow" events which pale in comparison to what New England goes through that my part of Alabama would ever see anything like the images we saw when the tornado ripped through Enterprise (near which I lived for the first half of my life in Alabama (which is exactly half of my life)) or the tornado that ripped through Prattville or the images from Hurricane Katrina. I never would have imagined it to be possible. It is for this very reason that the Steven Curtis Chapman song has really compelled me more than the other songs.
"It was the day the world went wrong." April 27, 2011 started and ended on a bad note for Alabama. There is hardly a county from Montgomery north that was not touched by that nasty storm system that brought that monster through Tuscaloosa, Birmingham, Cullman and every small and large town and city in between and around it.
"I screamed til my voice was gone." I think a lot of us have screamed. In horror. In anger. In pain. In anguish.
"And watched through the tears as everything came crashing down." I have not personally gone to Tuscaloosa yet. I do not quite have the courage and the strength yet. But I have seen the images. For me, the full reality has not sunk in yet. But we certainly watched in horror as the face of these areas were changed in a matter of minutes and hours.
"Slowly panic turns to pain as we awake to what remains and sift through the ashes that are left behind." I think of everyone sorting through the rubble, the remains of homes, churches, daycares, schools, businesses, etc. I think of the heartache that many are feeling as they find pictures, documents, toys, remnants of what was a life that was relatively normal as possible before that monster came through and changed everything.
"But buried deep beneath all our broken dreams we have this hope." We do have a hope. A hope and a promise. One of a better life. Maybe not on this earth, but it most certainly will be for the elect, those that belong to God.
Chorus:
"Out of theses ashes...beauty will rise." The cities and towns will be much more beautiful after they rebuild than they ever were.
"And we will dance among the ruins." For every person or animal found alive, there is joy.
"We will see Him with our own eyes." God is in every person who comes to the aid of the victims of this monster.
"Out of these ashes...beauty will rise."
"For we know joy is coming in the morning, in the morning, beauty will rise."
"So take another breath for now, and let the tears come washing down." Right now, we hurt. We need time to heal. And there will be tears. That's perfectly fine.
"And if you can't believe I will believe for you." Your faith may be weak. My faith may be tested. But together we can trust that things will indeed work together for the good of those who love the Lord.
"'Cuz I have seen the signs of spring! Just watch and see." Every little bird and every little flower that survived the storms that ripped through Alabama April 27 is a testimony of hope that springs eternal.
Chorus
"I can hear it in the distance and it's not too far away." Help is coming. That help is beautiful.
"It's the music and the laughter of a wedding and a feast." I went to Moody with my church this week to a church there that suffered a hole in their roof. But I did not see fear and tears. I saw strength and courage. I saw inspiration. I talked with a couple of little boys who were hanging out by the truck that brought the food afterward. They were both five and in kindergarten. One of them is really excited about starting first grade after the summer. Does he even know or understand how that storm disrupted his life? I don't know, but it was encouraging.
"I can almost feel the hand of God reaching for my face to wipe the tears away and say, 'It's time to make everything new.'"
"Make it all new." And new it will be made.
"This is our hope. This is the promise. This is our hope. This is the promise. That it would take our breath away to see the beauty that's been made out of the ashes, out of the ashes, that it would take our breath away to see the beauty that He's made out of the ashes, out of the ashes." As cities and communities rebuild, it will be beautiful.
Chorus
"Oh, beauty will rise. Oh, beauty will rise. Oh, oh, oh, beauty will rise. Oh, oh, oh, beauty will rise. Oh, oh, oh, beauty will rise." Beauty will indeed rise.
Lyrics from http://www.metrolyrics.com/beauty-will-rise-lyrics-steven-curtis-chapman.html.
And that's how everything begins to fit together.
Friday, April 8, 2011
Huge Announcement Post StadiumFest
First thing, if you missed StadiumFest this year, it was totally AWESOME! I got assigned to an inflatable - a slide - over in the Bronner Burgess Children's Play Area. Seeing the children have fun on it was a highlight. Bello, well, let's just say, he scared me. That man is absolutely crazy! Climbing to the top of some 90 foot sway pole. The minute he got to the top, I panicked. Did not see him come down the thing head first as I kept covering my eyes most of the time while he was up there. I'd sooner face a snake or a spider than watch that kind of stunt. Yikes!
Hearing Rick and Bubba give their testimonies. I was amazed. Befuddled, but amazed. I forget which one referenced the age of accountability, but as I have learned, there is no age of accountability. It's not Biblical! In the grand scheme of learning more about predestination, God knows exactly who and when someone will finally accept His pursuit of them and become a Christian. But they still had great stories.
Casting Crowns. I'm not much into their music. They have the same flavor as MercyMe. And their music is not really up my stream. But Casting Crowns was great. They sang "Praise You in This Storm." Mark Hall wrote it as he was going through some hard stuff involving his adopted daughter, who like me, has a lot of medical challenges to face. His story about his daughter really hit close to home and gave me a new source of inspiration. And believe it or not, this really stiff Presbyterian actually raised her hands WAY up during some of the songs that Casting Crowns did. Good luck getting me to actually do that at church though. I don't think I'm quite there yet.
Oh my word. All I could think is when is TobyMac coming out, right? TobyMac was my highlight. Sort of, but I'll explain in a few paragraphs about the sort of. They brought Bello out again. Let's just say, the difference in seeing him on top of that pole in broad daylight and then at night, well, something about the night does really make things much scarier and more intense. Absolutely could not watch this time around. Those hands shot over my eyes allowing for only a small peek. You know like how when young children get uncomfortable when two people on the screen start kissing? Yep.
Finally, TobyMac. Let's just say, I wasn't the only one who nearly burst at the seams. Funny thing was that near where I was seated/standing, there was a family with teenagers and their mom was more excited about TobyMac than I was, and I was like a giddy school girl when he came out. Yep. I actually squealed in delight! If you have never heard me emit that high-pitched squeal before, good luck getting it out of me.
And I know he reads his Facebook fan page! I actually had posted that if he sang "Made to Love," "Get Back Up," and "City on Our Knees," that it would be the highlight for me. Guess what? He sang ALL three of those songs! He did songs off every one of his albums and quite a few off his newest album. And one of the culminating songs was a throwback to DCTalk days - "Jesus Freak." When he finished "City on Our Knees," he spun off with "Greater things have yet to come, greater things are still to be done in this city." Instantly I thought of my church and my pastor, who absolutely loves the message of that song. Sadly, TobyMac wrapped us up with "Sha na na na, hey hey hey, good-bye." I think I actually wanted to cry at this point because I did not want the night to end.
By the way, I reapplied sunblock every two hours. Came out with seven sun burned patches. I did not know I had to put the stuff on my ears. And I think I may have gotten the darkest I'll ever get on my arms, but mostly I have more freckles. Ugh. God's design though. Fair skinned, red-haired people are not made for the sun. And wearing ear plugs. Uncomfortable little things, but with a mild hearing loss, I saved whatever hearing I have left. There's a reason God made a worrywort.
One thing that concerned me. My church does not do altar calls. I could kind of understand why after witnessing no fewer than four of them at StadiumFest. The emotions are high at those kind of events, so if you have altar calls, how many of those professions of faith are genuine? And how do altar calls fit in the grand scheme of predestination? And Scott Dawson made it sound as though if you prayed the prayer and did not go forward that you were somehow sinning. So of course, I have some confusion.
But I said I had a huge announcement.
I went into StadiumFest as a volunteer. Thank you Facebook advertisements. But I had some serious doubts about my own salvation going in. So, during one of those calls, I did pray that little prayer. I did not go forward, but I did pray. And the majority of my doubts are gone.
Now if only I could help make things right with some friends and all of us could see restoration, I think everything might start looking brighter. There's a prodigal who wants to come home and a little lost lamb who wants to return to the flock. She just needs to know that it's okay.
Hearing Rick and Bubba give their testimonies. I was amazed. Befuddled, but amazed. I forget which one referenced the age of accountability, but as I have learned, there is no age of accountability. It's not Biblical! In the grand scheme of learning more about predestination, God knows exactly who and when someone will finally accept His pursuit of them and become a Christian. But they still had great stories.
Casting Crowns. I'm not much into their music. They have the same flavor as MercyMe. And their music is not really up my stream. But Casting Crowns was great. They sang "Praise You in This Storm." Mark Hall wrote it as he was going through some hard stuff involving his adopted daughter, who like me, has a lot of medical challenges to face. His story about his daughter really hit close to home and gave me a new source of inspiration. And believe it or not, this really stiff Presbyterian actually raised her hands WAY up during some of the songs that Casting Crowns did. Good luck getting me to actually do that at church though. I don't think I'm quite there yet.
Oh my word. All I could think is when is TobyMac coming out, right? TobyMac was my highlight. Sort of, but I'll explain in a few paragraphs about the sort of. They brought Bello out again. Let's just say, the difference in seeing him on top of that pole in broad daylight and then at night, well, something about the night does really make things much scarier and more intense. Absolutely could not watch this time around. Those hands shot over my eyes allowing for only a small peek. You know like how when young children get uncomfortable when two people on the screen start kissing? Yep.
Finally, TobyMac. Let's just say, I wasn't the only one who nearly burst at the seams. Funny thing was that near where I was seated/standing, there was a family with teenagers and their mom was more excited about TobyMac than I was, and I was like a giddy school girl when he came out. Yep. I actually squealed in delight! If you have never heard me emit that high-pitched squeal before, good luck getting it out of me.
And I know he reads his Facebook fan page! I actually had posted that if he sang "Made to Love," "Get Back Up," and "City on Our Knees," that it would be the highlight for me. Guess what? He sang ALL three of those songs! He did songs off every one of his albums and quite a few off his newest album. And one of the culminating songs was a throwback to DCTalk days - "Jesus Freak." When he finished "City on Our Knees," he spun off with "Greater things have yet to come, greater things are still to be done in this city." Instantly I thought of my church and my pastor, who absolutely loves the message of that song. Sadly, TobyMac wrapped us up with "Sha na na na, hey hey hey, good-bye." I think I actually wanted to cry at this point because I did not want the night to end.
By the way, I reapplied sunblock every two hours. Came out with seven sun burned patches. I did not know I had to put the stuff on my ears. And I think I may have gotten the darkest I'll ever get on my arms, but mostly I have more freckles. Ugh. God's design though. Fair skinned, red-haired people are not made for the sun. And wearing ear plugs. Uncomfortable little things, but with a mild hearing loss, I saved whatever hearing I have left. There's a reason God made a worrywort.
One thing that concerned me. My church does not do altar calls. I could kind of understand why after witnessing no fewer than four of them at StadiumFest. The emotions are high at those kind of events, so if you have altar calls, how many of those professions of faith are genuine? And how do altar calls fit in the grand scheme of predestination? And Scott Dawson made it sound as though if you prayed the prayer and did not go forward that you were somehow sinning. So of course, I have some confusion.
But I said I had a huge announcement.
I went into StadiumFest as a volunteer. Thank you Facebook advertisements. But I had some serious doubts about my own salvation going in. So, during one of those calls, I did pray that little prayer. I did not go forward, but I did pray. And the majority of my doubts are gone.
Now if only I could help make things right with some friends and all of us could see restoration, I think everything might start looking brighter. There's a prodigal who wants to come home and a little lost lamb who wants to return to the flock. She just needs to know that it's okay.
Monday, February 14, 2011
TobyMac and Theology
Unbelievable as it may seem, one of the most theologically sound singer/songwriters right now is TobyMac. Yes, TobyMac, of DC Talk fame. Presently, I have several of his songs on my playlist, including many from his latest album release, Tonight. So what do songs like "City on Our Knees," "Break Open the Sky," "Get Back Up," and a slightly older song, "Made to Love" all have to do with theology?
Well, "City on Our Knees" has a strong missional message. And missions is not just going to some foreign land. Missions can happen right in our own homes, our neighborhoods, and yes, even in the walls of our church.
"Break Open the Sky" not only has a missional message, but also an anticipatory message. We anticipate the work of Jesus, the work of God to supersede our own human efforts.
"Get Back Up" is a little more personal, but this song has held me up through some of my weakest times over the course of the past year. I don't want this to get too personal on this blog but I am now past the one year mark since I first got tested by my first immunologist who found that I have an incurable, untreatable immune deficiency that makes me more vulnerable to bacterial infections, but really any infection. It's when I first realized the importance of friendships and began to really reach out via Facebook and make connections online so that if God ends up superseding in His own way I can still have my friends. And now I can imagine half of any reader of this post is now going "Aha! So that's why...." But this song reminds me of how grace operates.
"Made to Love." Shorter Catechism Question 1: "What is the chief end of man?" Answer: "Man's chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy him forever." We truly were made to love God, and even though really only the elect were made to find God, we were made to find Him, just for Him, and to be loved by Him.
Amazing how sometimes music really makes theology click.
Well, "City on Our Knees" has a strong missional message. And missions is not just going to some foreign land. Missions can happen right in our own homes, our neighborhoods, and yes, even in the walls of our church.
"Break Open the Sky" not only has a missional message, but also an anticipatory message. We anticipate the work of Jesus, the work of God to supersede our own human efforts.
"Get Back Up" is a little more personal, but this song has held me up through some of my weakest times over the course of the past year. I don't want this to get too personal on this blog but I am now past the one year mark since I first got tested by my first immunologist who found that I have an incurable, untreatable immune deficiency that makes me more vulnerable to bacterial infections, but really any infection. It's when I first realized the importance of friendships and began to really reach out via Facebook and make connections online so that if God ends up superseding in His own way I can still have my friends. And now I can imagine half of any reader of this post is now going "Aha! So that's why...." But this song reminds me of how grace operates.
"Made to Love." Shorter Catechism Question 1: "What is the chief end of man?" Answer: "Man's chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy him forever." We truly were made to love God, and even though really only the elect were made to find God, we were made to find Him, just for Him, and to be loved by Him.
Amazing how sometimes music really makes theology click.
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