God Is with You

Matthew 1:23 - "Behild, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel" (which means, God with us). 

Colossians 2:6-7 - Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so balk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving.

Dear God, help me to always find You no matter what comes my way. Everything that happens is in Your plan and in Your time. Whether it be reconciliation with Tom, health situations, or even the beautiful rose after a long hard rainstorm. It is easy to believe that every good thing comes from You, but it is harder to believe that anything we perceive as negative also comes as a result of Your hand. It is about having fresh insight that You alone control all things, good and bad. Thank You for insight. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

Don't Be Tricked

I Corinthians 13:13 - So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

II Corinthians 4:18 - ...as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient but the things that are unseen are eternal.

Ephesians 3:20-21 - Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

Dear God, According to this, You are most definitely sovereign. But it seems that we, as humans, often forget this fact. If only we would rest in Your sovereignty then maybe we might actually stand a fighting chance against all that is evil and against Your word. By that, I don't mean that we call a president names or speak ugly about him just because we might disagree with something he does. God, please bless President Obama as I know that he has been trying to bring America back to You through actions of trying to make sure that those who most need assistance have it. Healthcare for one. It seems that in light of everything that has been happening in America, people, including those who claim to be Christians, have forgotten You and what Your purpose for our lives really is. They have allowed color to blind them and their integrity. They have shown that racism is still very much alive in America. And they have proven that greed is abundant in their attitude toward poor and sick people. They do not want to make sure that everyone has food or healthcare because they think that people are just lazy. But that is simply not the truth at all. If it were not for taxes, there truly might not be any charity at all in America. Americans are greedy. I know. I am an American, and it is hard for me to want to part with whatever little bit of money I might have. When a church discriminates against someone because that person has special needs and then they go so far as to even say comply with our discrimination against you, give us permission to abuse you more than we already have or else we will not show you any mercy no matter what the situation, it proves how greedy and how corrupt and how vile churches have even become when it comes to people in need. It breaks my heart. Faith, hope, and love. They are eternal. But sometimes it is hard to keep them when people keep knocking you down and beating up on you and bruising your spirit. Help me God to keep them strong though. Help me this next week to finish the letter and the chart to go with it. Help me to actually send it. Help me not be afraid and to keep trusting You. Thank You. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

God's Providence Is Baffling

Friday afternoon, Alabama saw some nasty weather come through. We lost tree number five. But a lot of good was seen for my family despite that storm.

Good thing number one: We had decided that the dog would come in before the storms Friday because a storm Monday broke the tree and made it lean. We did not know if and when it would finally crash down, but we did not want the dog outside when it did. Sure enough, it crashed down during Friday's storms. The dog's mad at it now, but at least she is alive and unharmed.

Good thing number two: We were in my 4WD heading to Wal-mart in Pelham. They have some gluten free things. On the way, a girl hydroplaned. She crashed into the semi in the left turn lane and not us. The semi had a crossbar under the back of the trailer preventing her from going under. The driver felt it which made him park it instead of driving off and dragging her car with him. But other than that, no one was hurt.

Good thing number three: We stopped by CVS between Pelham and Alabaster which is when the sirens blared. Found out later that a tornado went over the Wal-mart shopping centers in Alabaster. We were not there because we went further out to a different Wal-Mary.

If I think about it, I saw God's providence and sovereignty and predestination at work Friday. But why is it still so baffling?

Where Is God When It Hurts?

Where is God when it hurts?
Where is He when your whole world has crashed down around you?
Where is He when the hurt has gotten to a point that there are no words to express your grief because those words have not been invented yet?
Where is He when life becomes unbearable?
Where is He when your heart has been shattered?
Where is He when you feel like giving up?
Where is He when you feel like there is no one left who you can trust?
Where is He when you've gone completely numb because it hurts that bad?
Where is He in the midst of strife?
Where is He when you cry out with all your might?
Where is He when you've cried your last tear but still want to cry?
Where is He when the prodigal is ready to return and repent?
Is He listening?
Does He care?
Does He still love you?
Can He be trusted?
Is He there?
Will He still be there?
Will He care?
Will He still love you?
Will He listen?
Will He stay or will He go?
Will He pick you up from a big fall, hug you and say, "Child, I love you?"
Will He forgive you?
Will He wipe away the tears?
Will He repair the brokenness of life, love, friendships?
Can He?
Where is God when it hurts?

God's Providence and Sovereignty in Earthquakes, Tsunamis and Solar Flares

I am at a loss over the idea of God's providence and sovereignty today. Not only because of a personal attack on my emotional health by someone I thought I could trust, but also because of the solar flares and the earthquakes in Japan and the tsunamis in Hawaii and California.

The timing of the solar flares and the earthquakes which caused the tsunamis is just too coincidental for anyone to ignore. We all learned in science that the tidal waves are affected by lunar phases. So how much impact can solar flares, which involve magnetic fields, have on earthquakes?

A lot of big words have been thrown out today to try to explain the earthquakes and the tsunamis, but those words do not help explain why they really occurred.

If by some chance the solar flares can be linked to the earthquakes, then it must by some great design out of that sovereignty of God that I have been learning about and wrestling so hard with trying to understand as more and more of my "onion heart" gets peeled away through mistakes and being open to whatever God is trying to do in my life right now. That is why things have been so tumultuous of late.

But what I wrestle with is understanding how to put that in the reach of those who have been personally affected. I have friends in Hawaii and friends and family in California. The last I heard from my friends in Hawaii via Facebook is that they were safe but still under warnings. I have no word to report from California yet. But I have had to stop watching the news because it is so worrisome for me.

How do I explain God's providence and sovereignty in all of this when I do not fully understand it myself?

A Constant Struggle With Sovereignty and Providence

Without getting into too many personal specifics right now, I want to be honest enough to admit that I am in a constant struggle with sovereignty and providence. If God is sovereign, then He knows everything that will happen and when they will happen, but I often wonder why He would let certain things happen because He has the power to stop the bad things from happening, yet He doesn't? And if providence is God working things out for the good of those people He predestined to be His, then where do the bad things come in? Why does He allow them?

Please understand that I am not asking why He let me have an immune deficiency that has no cure or treatment. Grant it, to this day I still say that if only it had been cancer at least I would have SOME choice in the matter because cancer can be treated. But I am not talking about that.

I am talking about, and this is where it starts to get personal, child abuse. If God is sovereign and provident, then why is there any child abuse happening? What good can come out of child abuse? Look at the former victims of child abuse, especially the girls who were abused by their human fathers. A lifetime of scars and brokenness, lack of trust, suspicions, relational difficulties to battle and overcome on top of working out faith and understanding that God is a Father? Where is the providence in that?

I have been reminded many times by the "fatherly" men in my life that for a father to abuse their daughter is to set the daughter up for failure when it comes to understanding men and how they relate to them. This can make things difficult in the love department as the girl wrestles with whether she should tell the prospective suitor about the abuse. It's emotional baggage. And from personal experience, it can lead to the breaking of many a relationship. Not that I have THAT much personal experience, but I have had one guy friend who I got close too and had told. Surprisingly, he did not run away until after a letter he sent me that summer while I was at school and he was at home in which he brought up the word intimate to describe the type of friendship he wanted with me and that word threw me. He called me almost every day. People thought we were dating. I got scared. I called a cooling off for the time period he went on vacation. Toward the end of that summer I told him that I was afraid to continue in the relationship unless we were on the same page about what we both wanted - where we wanted the relationship to go. He couldn't decide. It hurt when he broke off the friendship and then made a professional threat against me, but it was probably the best thing for me. If two people cannot concur on where they want a relationship to go, then it may not be a healthy relationship.

Then again, what exactly is a HEALTHY relationship? When a person comes from a long line of broken relationships, how can they know what a truly healthy relationship is?

It goes back to my struggle with God's sovereignty and providence. Don't misunderstand me when I admit to having that struggle. I'm not saying I don't believe in it. I do believe. But I have a hard time understanding and grasping it.