Today's Jesus Calling kids and teen versions talk about God's Peace. I love the title in the kids version: "I Am Bigger Than the World." It almost reminds me of the VeggieTales song, "God is bigger than the bogeyman."
God's peace is compared to diving into a cool pool on a hot summer day. The reminder is that God is always there and has already overcome the problems we will face in the world. - John 16:33
Dear God, As I face the newness associated with this new year, grant me the peace that You have promised. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Extra TLC Needed
Yes, as autistic, I can seem more "demanding." I don't mean to be. I don't mean to push people away or be overbearing. These are traits I can't control. I don't always understand social graces or etiquette. But I'm trying.
When I am going through a rapid fire transition time, like I am now: new church, new activities, new friends among old friends, new everything really, I get scared.
Like right now, and I have to apologize to Tom, but we are transitioning from what may have been a strained relationship because it seemed forced and it was restricted. Now we are more free to be friends. But I don't know what to do. And I'm scared. I'm afraid of doing something to lose him because I never really learned how to be a friend to someone.
So I asked for boundaries because I need safety in the transition so it will be successful. But I think it made him snap and it feels like he is angry with me now. Because now we went from one extreme, too loose, to the other, too restricted.
But right now, since I can't talk to him until Friday, I'm stuck.
But in the meantime, I could really use some extra TLC if you don't mind.
When I am going through a rapid fire transition time, like I am now: new church, new activities, new friends among old friends, new everything really, I get scared.
Like right now, and I have to apologize to Tom, but we are transitioning from what may have been a strained relationship because it seemed forced and it was restricted. Now we are more free to be friends. But I don't know what to do. And I'm scared. I'm afraid of doing something to lose him because I never really learned how to be a friend to someone.
So I asked for boundaries because I need safety in the transition so it will be successful. But I think it made him snap and it feels like he is angry with me now. Because now we went from one extreme, too loose, to the other, too restricted.
But right now, since I can't talk to him until Friday, I'm stuck.
But in the meantime, I could really use some extra TLC if you don't mind.
First Two Days of 2013
I started Jesus Calling for kids and for youth yesterday. The language is so simplistic. Next year I will advance to the actual Jesus Calling. And sometime this year I want to get the Jesus Calling Bible Storybook.
Anyway, yesterday started with Jeremiah 29:13 as the introduction to January. The title of the first devotion in the kids version? "Get Ready for the Adventure!" Focal verse? Jeremiah 29:11.
Hold the brakes! The devotion actually SPOKE to me EXACTLY where I am at in life NOW. How? I'm being asked to come to God with a changeable heart.
Today was not much different. I ran into Matthew 7:7 which is like Jeremiah 29:13. In Jesus Calling, it was "Choose Me." Relax in God's presence.
Why is that so hard to do?
Maybe it goes back to expectations?
Tom, why did you have to throw me a teaching moment today?
I do vaguely recall a sermon from Bob on Luke 10:39-42. Martha got reprimanded for being BUSY BUSY BUSY while Mary sat and listened.
Are we TOO BUSY to slow down and notice when a friend is hurting or in need? Are we TOO BUSY to truly LISTEN? Are we TOO BUSY?
Yes, some friends may "demand" more time than others, but if you're TOO BUSY to listen, you may miss out on the deeper reason that may hold all the answers you need.
So here we are two days in the new year and we have:
Come to God willing to change
and
Relax in God's presence.
Not sure the lessons get bigger than that, but if they do, I may be in trouble!!!
Anyway, yesterday started with Jeremiah 29:13 as the introduction to January. The title of the first devotion in the kids version? "Get Ready for the Adventure!" Focal verse? Jeremiah 29:11.
Hold the brakes! The devotion actually SPOKE to me EXACTLY where I am at in life NOW. How? I'm being asked to come to God with a changeable heart.
Today was not much different. I ran into Matthew 7:7 which is like Jeremiah 29:13. In Jesus Calling, it was "Choose Me." Relax in God's presence.
Why is that so hard to do?
Maybe it goes back to expectations?
Tom, why did you have to throw me a teaching moment today?
I do vaguely recall a sermon from Bob on Luke 10:39-42. Martha got reprimanded for being BUSY BUSY BUSY while Mary sat and listened.
Are we TOO BUSY to slow down and notice when a friend is hurting or in need? Are we TOO BUSY to truly LISTEN? Are we TOO BUSY?
Yes, some friends may "demand" more time than others, but if you're TOO BUSY to listen, you may miss out on the deeper reason that may hold all the answers you need.
So here we are two days in the new year and we have:
Come to God willing to change
and
Relax in God's presence.
Not sure the lessons get bigger than that, but if they do, I may be in trouble!!!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Dealing with Disappointment
I won't say that it's easy because it isn't easy. But maybe instead of being disappointed in another person, we should evaluate ourselves and our expectations.
I made a decision. I cannot undo what led to the decision or even the decision itself. I won't. Because in some ways, I feel I was right. In many ways, what led to the decision, the way I was treated and made to feel, was wrong.
Stubbornness, lack of information and awareness, foolishness all cloud judgment. I got burned. Bad.
But I cannot undo what happened. All I can do is either learn what I can and change or hope they learn what they can and change.
In the meantime, all I can do is move forward. So that's what I'm going to do. New day, new year, clean slate. I'm moving on. You can go with me or you can stay where you are. But I'm not going to let you or anyone else keep me from reaching my potential and taking flight.
Happy New Year!
I made a decision. I cannot undo what led to the decision or even the decision itself. I won't. Because in some ways, I feel I was right. In many ways, what led to the decision, the way I was treated and made to feel, was wrong.
Stubbornness, lack of information and awareness, foolishness all cloud judgment. I got burned. Bad.
But I cannot undo what happened. All I can do is either learn what I can and change or hope they learn what they can and change.
In the meantime, all I can do is move forward. So that's what I'm going to do. New day, new year, clean slate. I'm moving on. You can go with me or you can stay where you are. But I'm not going to let you or anyone else keep me from reaching my potential and taking flight.
Happy New Year!
Monday, December 31, 2012
Inspired
Four things:
1. Started a jar project. Two jars this time. One jar of at least one milestone (can be anything from a new achievement to a health thing to whatever) and one jar for my friend Tom. My only two rules are: I cannot under any circumstance remove the slips from the jars. This could mean that there be repeats, but that's okay. My second rule: I must come up with at least one positive thing each day. The jar for Tom will be part of his Christmas gift next year.
2. Be more positive. The jars will be a visual aid for me. And I may need a huge pickle jar for Tom at the rate things are going, but if that happens, then that reinforces a new habit for me.
3. Dear future husband whoever you may be and wherever you are, I know God has chosen you for me and will bring us together in His time when He knows we are ready for each other. For you see, God made me very different. I have autism and ADHD as well as a special medical diet and allergies among other conditions. God is preparing you to be able to handle special needs and preparing your heart for adoption. Because I will not be able to have biological children due to some health complications. It takes a very special man with a very special heart to be able to love me in the way that God wants me to be loved. And you will have to answer so many questions from so many of the men in my life who have become friends with me and would do anything they can, within reason, to help protect me from being wounded. So to my future husband, we may or may not have ever met before, but that doesn't matter; what matters is that you love God, you treat women right, you have a heart and a compassion for special needs and you're ready and willing to adopt. Oh, and you can't drink or smoke. And must love dogs and cats. You're getting shots if you're allergic because all my life, I've had at least one of each all the time. Sincerely, your future wife
4. WHY DID it take the wise men two years to get to Jesus? If it were wise women, we would've asked directions! But I will do a separate post with my modern spin on the Christmas story. It may even be expanded!
Anyway, I just wanted to share this because for those of you that know about the decision I made, I want you to know that I love you and will miss seeing you as much as I have, but I am happier right now. Scared, but happy. And my friend Tom will know where I end up and will be able to update people on a need to know basis. Which means if he doesn't think someone needs to know, he ain't telling him/her. And it will be to protect me. But don't worry because it's just for a season while God moves the area into a position where churches are not only equipped for special needs children AND adults, but ready and have a heart song for them. The need is growing fast on a daily basis. We are ready for the harvest. We just need workers. And if this is something you have a heart for, feel free to let me know because I need a team to help make ready for what's coming. God has called me, and I am trying to listen, but I don't have all the resources yet. I need other people as well. And if you are local, we can still see each other and I'll come back and visit when my friend is available for special days. But I am happier and more at peace now, so I guess it was the right decision.
Love to all and Happy New Year!
1. Started a jar project. Two jars this time. One jar of at least one milestone (can be anything from a new achievement to a health thing to whatever) and one jar for my friend Tom. My only two rules are: I cannot under any circumstance remove the slips from the jars. This could mean that there be repeats, but that's okay. My second rule: I must come up with at least one positive thing each day. The jar for Tom will be part of his Christmas gift next year.
2. Be more positive. The jars will be a visual aid for me. And I may need a huge pickle jar for Tom at the rate things are going, but if that happens, then that reinforces a new habit for me.
3. Dear future husband whoever you may be and wherever you are, I know God has chosen you for me and will bring us together in His time when He knows we are ready for each other. For you see, God made me very different. I have autism and ADHD as well as a special medical diet and allergies among other conditions. God is preparing you to be able to handle special needs and preparing your heart for adoption. Because I will not be able to have biological children due to some health complications. It takes a very special man with a very special heart to be able to love me in the way that God wants me to be loved. And you will have to answer so many questions from so many of the men in my life who have become friends with me and would do anything they can, within reason, to help protect me from being wounded. So to my future husband, we may or may not have ever met before, but that doesn't matter; what matters is that you love God, you treat women right, you have a heart and a compassion for special needs and you're ready and willing to adopt. Oh, and you can't drink or smoke. And must love dogs and cats. You're getting shots if you're allergic because all my life, I've had at least one of each all the time. Sincerely, your future wife
4. WHY DID it take the wise men two years to get to Jesus? If it were wise women, we would've asked directions! But I will do a separate post with my modern spin on the Christmas story. It may even be expanded!
Anyway, I just wanted to share this because for those of you that know about the decision I made, I want you to know that I love you and will miss seeing you as much as I have, but I am happier right now. Scared, but happy. And my friend Tom will know where I end up and will be able to update people on a need to know basis. Which means if he doesn't think someone needs to know, he ain't telling him/her. And it will be to protect me. But don't worry because it's just for a season while God moves the area into a position where churches are not only equipped for special needs children AND adults, but ready and have a heart song for them. The need is growing fast on a daily basis. We are ready for the harvest. We just need workers. And if this is something you have a heart for, feel free to let me know because I need a team to help make ready for what's coming. God has called me, and I am trying to listen, but I don't have all the resources yet. I need other people as well. And if you are local, we can still see each other and I'll come back and visit when my friend is available for special days. But I am happier and more at peace now, so I guess it was the right decision.
Love to all and Happy New Year!
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Monday, December 3, 2012
I Wish I Was Normal!
It's sad when a church causes someone to feel so hurt that they would speak those words. It's the biggest insult to God.
But sadly, the document they have me was deemed as abusive, discriminating, and bullying.
So now what? I can't stay because I'll be excluded. But I don't want to lose my friends.
I'm not safe where I am now. I never will be until they start practicing Matthew 25.
What they did is wrong. They hurt me and hurt my relationships because of that one document.
"Flagrant disregard for the peace and purity of the church." Because I consulted experts to try to protect everyone from implications caused by the document. But yet they did the same thing to me spreading word about me against me.
I'm being excluded because I have autism.
I'm afraid. Afraid to lose my friends but more afraid to stay. Staying means excluded. Going means I lose my friends.
I'm confused. And I'm hurt.
Dear God, I'm sorry You made me the way You did. I wish I was normal. Because maybe then I wouldn't be excluded. I'm sorry for insulting You. Please forgive me. Amen.
But sadly, the document they have me was deemed as abusive, discriminating, and bullying.
So now what? I can't stay because I'll be excluded. But I don't want to lose my friends.
I'm not safe where I am now. I never will be until they start practicing Matthew 25.
What they did is wrong. They hurt me and hurt my relationships because of that one document.
"Flagrant disregard for the peace and purity of the church." Because I consulted experts to try to protect everyone from implications caused by the document. But yet they did the same thing to me spreading word about me against me.
I'm being excluded because I have autism.
I'm afraid. Afraid to lose my friends but more afraid to stay. Staying means excluded. Going means I lose my friends.
I'm confused. And I'm hurt.
Dear God, I'm sorry You made me the way You did. I wish I was normal. Because maybe then I wouldn't be excluded. I'm sorry for insulting You. Please forgive me. Amen.
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