Sunday, June 22, 2014

I Am Good

Psalm 34:8 - Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!

Psalm 34:8 (ICB) - Examine and see how good the Lord is. Happy is the person who trusts the Lord.

Isaiah 55:8-9 - For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Dear God, please help me trust that You are working for the good in my life even in times of hardships. Although I would prefer to understand the why of things, just like anyone else. But this past week has given everyone a glimpse of just how much we may never understand. A child left in a hot car all day died. And it seems that it may be possible that the father may have planned it and no one has heard what the mother thinks about everything being said about her husband or her child. A man is in jail possibly missing his child's funeral today. Media are trying to turn the funeral into a media circus. And the man might not get the fair trial he has a right to because too many people have condemned him before knowing ALL the facts. Even the most thorough story released leaves questions to be asked. And even I am trying to believe the best, but am starting to lean toward condemning him based on that thorough story. But where the case sets a slippery slope is knowing that the majority of cases in which a child has been left in a hot car have never resulted in charges or jail, and this case may set precedent. Especially when there are so many self-righteous hypocritical judgmental "I would never forget my child!" parents out there who although they might not have had it happen yet could have it happen and then may face the same judgments as this man has. If the internet search on the man's computer and if it was before he was arrested, then yes, he may deserve to be judged and condemned, but if the internet search happened and if it was after his arrest, then he has been unfairly judged and the people who have already condemned him in their hearts and minds are guilty of sin. Someone actually had the nerve to tell me they hope that I am not a parent just because I posted questions that needed answering before I could pass a judgment and reminders of the tips the media has been sharing ever since the first summer a child died from being forgotten in a hot car. They were mean and ugly when they said that and I said when I do become a parent to an adopted child that my child will learn to love and respect others and to look for the best and never spread hate or judgment before knowing all the facts like that woman did when she said those things to me. And as much as I would hope to be the best parent I could possibly be, I know and my child will know that I will never be perfect. But here is where I do see the good in why You have chosen to allow me to go through the physical problems I have right now, God. It pushes me toward adoption as an avenue and I will be able adopt some older children who have been waiting for their forever families for a long time. I always said since I saw my first animal birth that I was just going to adopt. It looked painful and messy. And I told my mom I never want to go through that. I was probably 8 at the time. At age 10, I had my own My Girl moment with the body changes. And I said it again. I said I was just going to adopt. When the anemia shut down part of my body functioning, I told the doctor, I can just adopt anyway, so why do I need it? I meant what I said and I have never veered from the idea of adoption. But right now people are asking how any good parent can forget their child in a car. If the child is still rear facing and the child falls asleep (no sound and no movement), it is possible. Not every parent has those special mirrors because they inhibit the safety of the vehicle to start with. The media has been suggesting that parents immediately leave their own things in the back seat of the car when they put their child in and put the child's things in the front seat so that if they pull into work and reach for their things but instead grab the child's things, it jogs their memory after what might be a horrendous commute that the child needs to be dropped off first. And because so many of these cases happen every year, car manufacturers are working on a special sensor to install in the cars or the car seats. We have sensors and alerts for everything else in a car, why not one that could prevent more of these deaths from happening? That was also where the lady was rude with me and told me she hoped I wasn't a parent. She claimed I was wanting a car to be a nanny. Um...no. And if I was a parent, I would my car to have all the bells and whistles necessary to make my family safer. Others have said, well, maybe we should still be allowed to have the child in the front seat. No. Most vehicles come standard with front passenger airbags and if a car equipped with those ends up in a front end collision, while the child might not be ejected from the car, the force of both a front and a side airbag could instantly kill a child in the front seat. That is why the labels suggest leaving the child in the back until a certain age, height, or weight. Under the new standards, I would have been in a booster seat until close to the end of high school because I was tiny then. I keep saying that instead of judging the people who do forget, that we need to come up with a solution to prevent more of these cases from happening. But then there are still people who jumped on me for saying that. I suggested that since so many people are attached to their phones that they set reminders in the phones. And I explained that part of the forgetfulness comes from the fact American society as a whole has become too busy for its own good. Which actually is quite sadly true. Then someone else jumped down my case for saying that. She got blocked though because I was tired of her nonsense. But I have experienced the busy-ness of people and I have often suffered because of it, so I know. And the one thing I do have the right to say is stop! You are not going to drag me into being so busy that I cannot function or breathe or have time for myself. My body will crash and burn if I dragged into that mess. I know because at least once a week, I do have a body crash. It shuts down on me mentally, emotionally, or physically. And it is not a pleasant experience. So when it does that, I have to stop and change my plans and let my body have its rest. And maybe that comes with the territory of the autism and the sensory issues, but it is a good things because it means I am learning what I need and what I can and cannot handle and how to deal with it. Thank You God for giving me that wisdom. Thank You for I stilling compassion in me and a desire for the entire truth in all situations. If only others had the same desire for the whole truth, then maybe I would not have to write and send what may be the hardest letter that I will ever have to write and send to someone who needs to recognize and know the truth and then will have to be open to responding in kind. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

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