Marriage and True Oppression

Marriage as God designed it is between ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN. Sexuality immorality is a sin. Period. 

This week has been none other than hell for Christians like me who believe God's Word on these things to be true. 

People who lack understanding of the fact that Jesus came calling Christians judgmental, bigots, hypocrites.

The thing is, are not the people throwing out these accusations actually doing the very thing they accuse Christians of doing? 

Bigotry: intolerance of another's opinion and his or her expression of it. Case in point: I expressed my stance and suddenly a now former friend demanded that I not only respect his opinion but then blatantly accused me of enjoying oppressing others in the name of religion. Seriously? 

In many Islamic countries, they can stone a homosexual to death! Now tell me more about how Christians in America have oppressed them?

Hypocrites? Because we live under New Testament grace because we believe Jesus came to fulfill the Old Testament law? Because we eat meat that God told Peter was now clean? Because churches, mainly in cases of sexual immorality as Jesus permits, allow divorce? Because we are not living legalistic lives anymore?

Oh, and another abused phrase? Separation of church and state. 

Hmm.... America was founded by people escaping the Church of England, which was government ran. They said that government is not to establish religion or run churches. Hence the First Amendment. Perhaps every major needs to study all aspects of the implications of the First Amendment. My journalism classes focused on two concepts in it. 

Anyway, separation of church and state is to protect citizens from government establishing religion and running churches. Not to keep churches and Christians from having a say in politics. 

Jesus didn't forbid homosexuality. Actually, Jesus defined marriage in Matthew 19:5. This passage is where He taught about divorce.

Frankly, here's the thing. 

Being attacked and accused by this friend hurt. Especially since even after I demonstrated grace and forgiveness, he did it again. Three times he has been called out for the same offense now. And now extreme measure will be taken. I have already filed a report and will block him in 48 hours. I did what God called me to do though because when he demanded I respect his opinion while attacking mine, he also said some nasty things about God and attacked my faith, my Christianity. And so I must remove him from my life before he can bring me down any further.

Also, in terms of oppression. Who are the oppressed in America? Not homosexuals who scream out so loudly and then accuse Christians of being hateful. Nope. Not them. Why? Because they CHOSE to live in sin. 

The oppressed in America:

1. Elderly

2. Children

3. Poor

4. Disabled, special needs

5. Veterans

6. Hungry

7. Christians

How? 

1. Being disrespected and being cut short their SSI and SNAP and Medicare

2. Lack of quality education

3. Oh, they are nothing but lazy moochers! Really? When was the last time you say and talked with one about his or her story?

4. Did you know that some loophole in the 1938 fair wage act allows Goodwill to pay some disabled workers as little as 22 cents an hour? Slave labor basically. To think a company could do that to me and get away with it?!? Oh, and the Affordable Care Act is the FIRST law that actually finally upholds the Americans with Disabilities Act when it comes to ensuring that people with per-existing conditions finally have the promised "same access to the same affordable healthcare?" And, further, we substantially lack services and programs and community resources as well as insurance coverage for them for adults with autism?

5. See 1 and 3 and 5

6. Suddenly everyone who has ever needed SNAP is a lazy moocher? Wow. Again, when's the last time you got the story?

7. That's what this post focused on.

God, I pray Your Word continues to give Christians strength and courage. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

Father to the Fatherless

So Father's Day is pretty big. For dads, uncles, grandfathers, and brothers. But I want to point out that not everyone has a human father to celebrate. Some people are estranged or orphaned. But you see, I have learned something important from my friend, Tom. You see, he has been an example of what a REAL dad is like. And through him, I have another glimpse of someone much better than any human father could ever be. I have a glimpse of God. God. Father to the fatherless. So this Father's Day, I am thankful that I am not fatherless anymore. I have a Father who is so much more. I have God. Thank you Tom for teaching me by your example! I love you "Papa" Patton! 

Trapped Inside My Own Body

So because of the laryngitis, I cannot verbally communicate. And it's hard to make myself understood. It's going to be like this until I get better. I'm not to attempt to talk while I'm squeaky. 

It was starting Monday. By Tuesday, it was squeaking. By Wednesday, for a very important event, it was worse. Today, it just isn't able to happen. There is a lot of pain. The ENT did look and he said the vocal cords were very swollen. I had to get a second shot, a steroid shot. It should ease the swelling. But now I have to wait and hope for the best next week so I can rehabilitate. 

Okay, so day one of being trapped inside my own body. What is like? What is it like to be a nonverbal and have high functioning autism? 

Frustrating! Not everyone can understand the gestures or sign language. I can't always access my iPhone. I don't have an iPad or other augmentive communication device. I don't always have pen and paper. I can't talk on the phone. 

I can't make myself understood at the doctor. That was hard trying to do. I can't make myself understood at the library. And even with my own mother, it's hard.

I'm frustrated and going into significant meltdown. I lash out at my closest relatives and friends. I can't get out. 

It's like another person lives inside of me and she's the evil twin. She's pushing me away because I'm vulnerable. And she's strong! 

I want out. I feel trapped. I have a voice. It needs releasing. 

Why won't anyone help me? Is anyone even there? I'm scared.

The Day the World Went Silent

This world is not set up for nonverbal people. Look around. How many people are talking on their cell phones or in conversation with someone? When you go to eat somewhere, you place your order using verbal communication. When you use the phone, it's verbal communication. For a nonverbal person, they have to try to rely on sign language, written communication, technological communication devices (also called augmentive communication, iPads, iPhones, etc.), or others to communicate needs and wants. 

Well, I feel a little like Carly Fleischmann and Elizabeth Bonker and all the other nonverbal high functioning people with autism. I am trapped inside of my own body with a voice to get out. I have laryngitis. Really bad. I don't need the doctor to tell me that but rather to tell me why and treat it. 

We all have a voice. We just use it differently. Will you listen? 

I feel I finished enough Stop! Look! And LISTEN! videos on YouTube for now. Go view them at TheSes31 channel if you want personal insight into autism.

But here's the thing, I decided my job is missionary, local, doing puppets and helping churches build special needs ministries. I will be launching a letter writing campaign to start with local churches and share with them about how autism impacts the church. I am hoping to try to partner with other organizations along the way. 

Pray for me. Physical healing. Pray for my family. Financial situation and god's provision for that. Pray for my friend Tom. He has a lot going on! And hopefully, we will survive. 

Praise You In This Storm

Dear Oklahoma Friends and Family, the Casting Crowns song which my post is titled after comes back to me right now. I feel a sense of déjà vu as I remember that two years ago, we endured the same weather pattern here in Alabama. It literally feels as if our weather has flipped upside down this year. I am torn. All I can say is stay strong and God is there, with you. Sincerely, a former Oklahoman

Thursday Thoughts

So my "friend" was gone for two weeks. And right now, I wish he was still gone because I haven't had quality since he's been back. And it feels like he's not my friend anymore, and that really hurts. At a time when I need my friend the most, he's NOT there. I feel sad. I feel confused. I feel torn. If this is what friendship is going to be like, I no longer want any friendship with anyone because in the end I will only be hurt and that's not fair.

Also, yesterday, I made my first real leap of faith with God. My mom keeps saying we'll make it work, we'll make it work. I don't know how we'll make it work. If she doesn't get a new job soon, we'll be down to bare bones minimum between whatever disability and veterans disability is each month. It may mean I cannot get essential medications or essential needs for a long time. Especially since my insurance is bare bones until I can reapply without denial next year (the "Obamacare") and doesn't cover some of the therapy I need due to the autism and other unaddressed issues. Voc Rehab doesn't really help much with what it used to either.

Part of that decision meant understanding that one of the reasons I didn't get the job is because I still am not socially ready for a job. So I'm taking a different and slower path. I'm focusing on therapy and volunteering per doctor recommendations to build toward readiness. I'm not giving up, but I realized yesterday I was seeking a paid job for the wrong reasons. 

I want to be a missionary. I want to use puppetry. That is my job. I want to work with others who have autism and help churches understand the role of autism in their churches. That's my job. I already had my job all along. I just need to figure out how to gain financial support for it. 

Friend or no friend, I'm sure Tom would be proud of me for my decision and what I just openly acknowledged. Now if I only knew what he was.

I Am Healing

Even though I still have some physical struggles and even though I have to constantly deal with the challenges of autism and ADHD, I wanted to share my thoughts. I am healing in ways that most people cannot fathom or understand.

I am healing.

I have immune deficiency. 

I wait for the day we can move forward into a life of infusions.

I am healing. I no longer NEED my ADHD medicine and it is now completely out of my system.

I am less fidgety, except when nervous or tired and then I cannot control my need to fidget anyway.

I have autism. 

But I am different, not less.

Treat me like you want to be treated.

Respect me like you want to be respected.

Give me my dignity. 

Help me to bring out my verbal communication.

Do you see how I am gifted in puppets and painting and music and writing? Use my gifts to help me communicate, to help me feel useful, to help me be me.

I have a mom.

She is persistent and relentless.

Don't hurt her baby. 

She might become a mama bear.

Grrrrowl!

I have a friend.

He was a pastor to me.

But now he's just my friend.

He's still a pastor for others though.

He is also like a second (and better) human dad.

He has a special connection with me that I cannot explain.

But it is good and it is necessary and God let it happen.

He believes in me even when I struggle to believe in myself.

He believes in me even when others might not.

He is compassionate and God gave him a big heart.

Because of me and his connection with me, he is now better prepared for a future in which the world has to hurry and start adapting in order to not just be aware of autism, but to embrace those of us who have autism so we can feel loved and accepted, so we can belong, so we can fit in, so we can function as a part of society. 

My friend will be part of the revolution in churches that will spearhead the adaptation of this world. 

My friend is special.

My friend is brave and courageous. He has to be in order to be my friend.

He is consistent and gracious. 

He is loving and tenderhearted.

He is my friend.

I have another friend.

She can seem kind of quirky. Then again, so can I!

She is an artist. Just like me!

She has an easy spirit. Just like me!

She has lots of love. Just like me!

Once you get deeper with her, you get a true friend with a loving heart that is so big that there's no way to escape the love.

I am learning to know God and to see God. 

My friends help a lot with that.

I don't get God in the books. 

I don't see God in the books or in church.

I hear about God at church.

I read about God in the books.

But I feel God. 

God is in the nice, cool breeze on a hot summer day.

God is in the light, refreshing rain after a long, hot week. 

God is in the babbling creek that you get your toes wet during a hot day at the park.

God whispers through creation.

I'm different, so I sense God differently.

See that beautiful rose, so delicate and frail? That's God!

Hear that tiny kitten mewing? That's God!

See a community rise up together after a disaster? That's God!

Feel loved by friends and family? Even that's God!

I was hurt really bad.

By someone who was supposed to be a dad.

By some people who called themselves friends.

By people who said they cared.

Some of them are no longer in my life. 

Others are reunited and also went through their own struggles.

Even though I am different, I am also the same.

We all struggle.

We all need to feel loved and accepted.

We all need to heal.

I am healing.

I am brave.

I am a friend.

I am a child.

I am an adult.

I am a person.

I am God's creation.

I am me!

I am gifted.

I am talented.

I am smart.

I am beautiful in spirit.

I am fun.

I am funny in my own way.

I am creative.

I am blessed.

I am loved.

I am valuable.

I am growing.

I am able in my own ways and sometimes with help.

I am healing.